Sunday, May 31, 2009

Stop Poaching! By Stefani

In the morning, it was quiet. The giraffes eat from the trees, pulling the leaves into their mouths. The restless trees swing back and forth in the breeze. It was beautiful, and the elephants were happy and proud.

BOOM!

An automatic gun exploded. The oldest male elephant fell immediately to the dusty ground. As he fell, he made a trumpeting sound. It sounded like a scream, as if he was begging for help. All the elephants left, stomping towards the forest for shelter. When the dust cleared, two elephants remained. One was a baby, and she was standing with her mom. Then, they heard the poachers screaming about their successful hunt. Both elephants hid behind a big bush because they sensed that if the hunters caught sight of them, they would die. After the hunters left with their prize, the baby elephant dashed to the male elephant and soon enough the baby realized that he had only two elephants left in his family: his mom and him. Soon enough, tear drops began to appear on both elephants' cheeks. It was as if they were crying, "Why? Why me!"
The mother elephant lifted her right foot carefully towards the male, then started to pat his tummy as gently as a feather. While the female was doing that the baby began to do a similar act, but instead of the foot he did it with his trunk. Both elephants stayed with the dying male for three days. Before the third day ended, a jeep passed by and saw the thirsty, dry, and tired elephants. There were two people in the jeep: a boy and a women named Jenny. The women immediately turned the jeep and drove towards the elephants.

They first gave the mother elephant water. "Johnny feed milk to the baby elephant," said his mother.
After the third bottle of milk was empty, Johnny begged, "Mom can we keep him? Please?" Johnny had been lonely since they moved to Africa. He was desparate for a friend, and he thought a pet elephant might do the trick!
"Maybe. Well... it's that I don't know about your dad," she said sadly because she hated to ruin the excitement in her son.

"You try to convince him for me? Or we could give him to dad as a present maybe?" replied Johnny.
"Maybe. But first I have to call some friends at the Elephant Care Center. They would tell us what to do next. It will take them a while to get back to us," she said, trying to stop Johnny from wanting it too much or getting his hopes up.
"Mommm! That is not true; it takes one week!" whined Johnny.
"We still have a problem! You can't have it as you present because it would be a late present and your father and I need to be the first one to give you a present!" moaned his mom.
"Then my birthday will be a one week later then my real birthday!" begged Johnny.

"I told you that I don't know about your dad," she repeated that line again and again. They contacts the Elephant Care Center and helped them load the grievng elephants into the trucks to take them to safety. They didn't talk about keeping them again, and when they went back home after they left the two elephant's at the Elephant Care Center, Johnny went to his room. He sat looking out his bedroom window wondering what tomorrow would hold.

The next morning, Johnny ran down the stairs to the kitchen. "Mom? Can I go check on the mother and baby elephants?" asked Johnny kindly.

"O.K.," his mom said. She loved that he was so caring.

"Did you convince dad?" Johnny whispered, hoping that the answer would be yes.


"Not yet, but I will try when you leave. Now go! He's coming, and I don't want him to know where you're going!" She replied with the most clearest and quietest whisper that Johnny could hear.

Johnny ran to the Elephant's Care Center. When he got there he saw the mother first. He asked someone that if he could feed the mother elephant some fruit and leaves. The man looked at him for 10 seconds and then said with a deep and dark voice, "Fine with me." So Johnny kept on feeding her until she was full and content. Then she slept. Johnny watched her for a while, then he began to back away, as slowly and quietly as a piece of paper floating in gentle breeze.
It was then that Johnny realized the elephants were in a good place. They were not made to be pets, they should be together. He promised that he would come and visit every day.

One day Johnny went to the Elephant Care Center to play with the baby elephant, which they had named Tambu. While Tumbu's mom slept in the red elephant house, which was like a dog house. It was 8:00 in the morning and the sun was almost all the way up in the sky. Johnny and Tambu ran and played all morning. They played tag and Tambu shot water at Johnny. Soon it was 12:00, time for lunch. As Johnny fed Tambu his lunch, he realized they had become friends. Tambu trusted Johnny - maybe even as much as his mom, which they had named Laura! Tambu had become more than his "pet", he was his friend. He talked to his elephant as if Tambu could really talk! John happily said, "This is how Africa should be, my friend, the most peaceful place I can imagine. I am so glad I get to share it with you and your mom. I wish we could have saved your father." After that he whispered this into Tumbu's large gray ears, Tambu wrapped his trunk around Johnny as if to hug him like saying thank-you for saying that. Johnny know what that meant or at least he thought that he did. So he said to Tomb, "Your welcome." Johnny went home and announced, "I have a friend now." He expect his parents to be happy but instead they looked at him like saying do you have 110˚F? Johnny ran to his room as soon as possible.

During dinner his dad asked Johnny, "Wwhat's your friend's name?" He said with a shy and nerves because his son never had a friend. Tambu he's an elephant."

"An elephant are you crazy! it could kill you!" his dad interrupted

Johnny ran to his room and soon enough he felled asleep. During breakfast it was only Johnny and his mother.

It was all silent till Johnny said,"You didn't tell him did you?" Yelling with a lot's of anger.

"No I didn't. Sorry. It's that I'm afraid." With that said Johnny's anger went away.

"Sorry I yelled at you like that. " He felt ashamed. Johnny left for school because his dad left to work more earlier then him. After school ended, he went to visit Tambu and his mother they were taking her a bath and Tambu well was just watching with a over protected look. He would yell if they got too close or bring something that is sharp or makes a loud noise that he doesn't know. Johnny always went to play with Tambu after school and volunteer to take Tambu a bath or do something little like feed him or try to teach him how to live in the wild. Sometimes when he visited he teaches him how his entire house looks like with a quick picture of it or a drawing witch is much realistic. One day before Johnny's birthday. His mom went to wake him up at 9:00 in the morning took him outside and said, "Surprise!"

By ~ Stefani

28 comments:

  1. Cassandra CampbellJune 4, 2009 at 12:02 PM

    I liked how you made the begging nice and calm until BOOM it changed the story. That was unexpected. GREAT JOB!
    ~ CASSANDRA

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  2. I liked your description and the begining.

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  3. Your story was really funny, After the third bottle of milk was empty, Johnny begged, "Mom can we keep him? Please?"

    Anders

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  4. I love the imagery!

    I like how you used problems that go on today, it means we can connect to your story.

    Johnny's conflict of keeping the elephant was a good way to show he has a good heart. great job

    adam

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  5. you have a super good story

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  6. I loved that story. I had many connections to when I wanted to get a puppy. Great Job

    Claire Andrews

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  7. You had a great story!! you had good description and you were loud enough. You were clear enough.

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  8. I like d your cliff hanger ending wich was very strong.

    I admit you made me tear up when they realized that they were really good friends,=.

    I liked the madness hwen he realized that his mom didnt tell his dad it was really real.

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  9. I really like that you were not shy and you were loud and clear nice job.

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  10. I really like your story. I like how you describe thing. I like the vocabulary that you use. GOOD JOB!

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  11. Your S.L.I.C.E was very good especially your voice and intlection.

    Brady A

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  12. you had good characters thoughts and feelings and you changed your voice

    ruben

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  13. I liked your beggining. Your ending was great you left suspense. It was really good.

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  14. I like your similies. I like how you read loud.

    Julio

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  15. I liked how at the end you said "Surprise" it was a big cliffhanger

    Cameron

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  16. Your story was very original and very touching. You made the animals come alive and talk to us through their actions. A very beautiful tale.

    Clay

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  17. It was really realistic how she change her voice for almost everything and how she gave elephants names

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  18. I liked how you ended your story making us wonder what the surprise was for.
    ~Amelia

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  19. Stephanie your story is so cool. I love your ending. Good story is so cool. I like so very,very much. congratuletions.

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  20. yay for you stefani. good story

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  21. your story is amazing stefani. The organization is really good.

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  22. I like how it was calm the a gun shot i thought that was really cool
    You had really good slice and slick
    I liked you personalities of the characters
    Kameron

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  23. wow i'm impressed how you started your story.

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  24. Stefanie, that was a great part of the story when you gave the elephants personalities that was done very well!! Great story it was fantastic!! - Paul

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  25. I like the beginning of your story. And I like who you put names to the character.
    ~Yesica~

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  26. Stefani good story, I liked how you used the word BOOM!!!!! Because it just caught my attention. Good job.
    ~Danicia.

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  27. Great job Stefani! I really liked your BOOM and how it was unexpected. I also like how you made the elephants real and you described everything so I could imagine what was going on. Awesome job Sefani!
    ~Melissa

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  28. Great job, Stefani. You did a fantastic job showing how elephants interact with each other...and humans they love. It makes me want to go work at an elephant orphanage! That's the goal of writers - to make someone want to do something.

    Keep reading and writing, Stefani. You are making great gains. Thank you for writing wonderful compliments for your classmates.

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